Unauthorized Entry
by saragillie
Summary: Vladie returns Jupiter's keys. What could possibly go wrong?


**AN: Written for the first Jupiter Ascending Fic Challenge. The words in bold are the ones for the challenge. Half of the credit belongs Dracaspina, who suggested the outline of the story and gave me valuable feedback after the first draft. There's a note at the end to explain a few things.**

Vladie tromped down the stairs looking for something to do. Nothing he'd tried seemed interesting or fun. His video game had gotten repetitive, most of his family was working or in school, and he'd just checked his usual Internet hangouts. Nothing.

His father stood in the hall below.

"Hey Dad, what's up?" Vladie inquired as he set foot in the hallway.

Vassily held up a set of keys with a planet hanging off the chain. "Jupiter must have dropped her keys when she left earlier."

"She was planning to go out with Caine after they finished the Stephens' house," Vladie mused. "They probably won't get in until late."

"I don't have time to drop the keys by their apartment." Vassily sighed heavily. "Taxes are due day after tomorrow and there are still several forms to fill out."

"I could take them by," Vladie offered, completely failing to hide his glee.

Vassily eyed him sternly. "You take the keys to her building. You put them in her mailbox and you come right back. No goofing off, no getting coffee. I need you to inventory the cleaning supplies when you get back. Will take several hours. I will text Jupiter that we found the keys and left them for her."

Vladie deflated. "Yes, Dad."

On the short drive to the apartment, he fumed. If only he had a better poker face, his father wouldn't have suspected a thing and he could have taken a peek at Jupiter's new apartment. Nobody had seen it yet. He had tried everything he could think of to wrangle an invitation. He'd overdone it the last time, and she'd told him he'd gotten on her last nerve and she wasn't ever inviting him over.

He parked in front of a multi-story building and walked up to the row of mailboxes, searching for the number that matched the one on her key. He finally found it. There was no slot on the front. He pushed the key into the hole and turned it. The door opened easily. Vladie pulled out the keys, tossed them into the box and shut the door. It wouldn't close. He looked at the mechanism more closely and realized that a key was necessary to lock it.

A gleeful smile covered his face. Now he had a reason to go up to the apartment. He'd leave the keys inside. He took the elevator to the top floor. It smelled funny, squealed, and rose slowly. 'I can't believe she left home for an apartment with an elevator that smells like stinky feet.'

Pulling the key out of the door, he pushed it open and slipped inside, quietly shutting the door behind him. A short hall opened onto a spacious living area. Caine must have a decent paying job for them to afford a place like this. Maybe he was an aerospace engineer or a financial advisor.

Vladie huffed to himself. Jupiter had become so closed mouthed lately. He knew almost nothing about Caine and hadn't met him yet. He needed to meet the guy, see if he was interested in a business opportunity.

Vladie's eyes skimmed over the books, lamps, and Jupiter's model of the solar system, barely registering the décor. They stopped on a large and unfamiliar object. He crossed the room to the shelf. A large chunk of purple iridescent rock sparkled like a **jewel**. It was heavy and cool to the touch. 'Must be Caine's.' He replaced the rock on its shelf

He spun in a circle taking in the layout. To the left a high counter separated the kitchen from an open living/dining room. To the right of the shelf, there was a hallway.

Curiosity warred with following his father's instruction for less than half a second before he walked toward the hall. He turned the first doorknob carefully and peaked into the room. A laptop sat on a large desk underneath a window. Next to it was a printer.

No, that wasn't a printer. There was no paper tray. Vladie tiptoed across the room and stared at the device. He didn't see any of the usual printer buttons either, but there was a round lump on side. He pressed it gingerly and then jumped back abruptly when it hummed to life, projecting blue images into the air with characters in an unknown script. He stared at it in fascination for a moment then moved forward and pushed the button again.

The blue projection disappeared. He sighed in relief and hightailed it back to the hallway.

The next door opened into a bathroom. The toothbrush holder had one toothbrush, a tube of toothpaste and… was that a fire stick? If it had had bristles on the end it might have been an electric toothbrush. But…

He looked around. No candles. Huh. If Jupiter wasn't lighting candles in here, why have a fire stick?

A wand about two feet in length sitting on a shelf in the combination bathtub and shower caught his attention. Vladie contemplated picking it up, but after his last mishap decided he'd better not touch it.

Opening the final door in the hallway revealed their bedroom. A king size bed with a dark wood frame dominated the room. Jackpot! He could discover something useful about Caine in here.

He slid back the closet door, revealing a jumble of Jupiter's clothes, shoes and accessories. She had a lot more clothes than he remembered and she seemed to be indulging her taste for designer dresses. Man, she got all the good breaks!

He slid the doors the other direction. Caine's side was spartan in comparison. There were five or six outfits all in black that looked like something a biker would wear, one blue button-up shirt, a pair of khakis, one pair of jeans, a sweater and five coats. A variety of hats sat on the shelf above. A rack of free weights occupied the remaining space.

Dresses like a biker, wears hats and lifts weights? What an odd combination. Maybe the dresser would be more forthcoming.

He pulled open a drawer at random. Whoops. Jupiter's underclothes. He opened the top drawer on the other side. The drawer was bare. No second watch, no extra set of keys, nothing. Not even a pen. Weird. He checked the drawer on the other side. It held Jupiter's jewelry like he thought it would.

The visit to the apartment wasn't turning out like he'd thought at all. Rather than satisfying his curiosity, he was now more intrigued than before. Who was this Caine and why was Jupiter hiding him from the family?

As he returned to the living room a locked cabinet caught his attention. Maybe it held the answers he was looking for.

He inspected the cabinet. The lock was an odd shape. He flipped through the keys on Jupiter's ring until he found an unusual one. It fit the lock and turned easily.

Vladie's mouth dropped in astonishment when he saw the arsenal inside. Caine liked to **hunt**? He examined the cabinet's contents more carefully. Unlikely, given the variety of weapons on the shelves.

He picked up what looked like a large handgun and examined it. The shape was right, but he couldn't read the letters.

Then he saw the assault rifle. Dropping the handgun, he snapped it up and set it to his shoulder. "Turn over the girl or I'll shoot!" he intoned in his best gangster voice.

He swapped it for a large barreled weapon, scooted over a few feet and half turned. "No, you drop your weapon or _I'll_ shoot!"

Vladie laughed, relaxing his arm. "Man, I could make a killing selling these."

"I'd put that down if I were you," an unknown voice suggested calmly. "The safety's off and a single shot would make a hole twelve feet wide and thirty feet long."

Vladie jumped and dropped it. He cursed loudly when it landed on his foot. Then he turned to face the voice. It belonged to a tall, well-built man dressed in black from head to toe with a gun pointed straight at him. "Why did you break into my house, Vladie?"

"You… you must be C… Ca… Caine," Vladie stuttered. His hands trembled. "But I've never met you. How do you know my name?"

Jupiter's voice floated in from the hallway. "Vladie? What are you doing here? Caine, can I come in now?"

"Please do," he growled. "And please do something about this!"

Jupiter hissed in displeasure at the scene in front of her. "Vladie, sit." She pointed to a chair on the far side of the room. "I specifically told you that you weren't welcome here. How did you get in?"

Vladie limped across the room and flopped into the chair, while Caine returned the weapons to their proper places and locked the cabinet.

"You dropped your keys at the house earlier. Dad found them and sent me to return them. I tried to leave them in your mailbox downstairs, but it wouldn't lock without the key."

"So you decided to leave them here and scope out my place?" Jupiter finished for him.

He nodded.

"You idiot! You could have killed yourself. You have no idea how any of those weapons work. How would I explain an accident like this!? You never think things through."

He slid deeper into his seat, half from shame and half from the tongue-lashing. When he thought about what his father would say, he sank even further. He hoped he didn't think of anything else, because the only place left to go was the floor.

Several minutes later when she'd vented most of her anger and her tirade was done, he asked, "How did you even know I was here?"

"We have a security system. You didn't punch in the code. The security company didn't know who you were and called us."

"I messed this up pretty badly, huh?"

"Royally! If you ever talk about this, I'll tell your father. Now, get out." She pointed imperiously at the door.

"Yes, your Majesty," he replied sarcastically as he made a beeline for the door. Jupiter didn't have anything to worry about. The whole incident had been so humiliating that he'd never tell the **tale**.

He glanced over his shoulder to identify a funny choking noise and realized that it was coming from Caine. Man, that guy was weird. No wonder she hadn't introduced him to the family.

"See you at dinner Friday night."

"Don't plan on this blowing over any time soon," Jupiter warned frostily. "You'll see me alright, but I have no intention of talking to you. Now leave and next time, mind your own business. I'm tired of you messing around in mine."

 **AN: The two items in the bathroom that Vladie doesn't recognize are Caine's personal grooming tools which are (of course) from space (one for cleaning the body and the other for cleaning teeth).**


End file.
